Thirty one years ago, May 2nd, a woman gave birth to her first child, a little girl, who arrived exactly on schedule. There were tears of joy, lots of smiles, etc as the parents, grandparents and others got to meet her. Anyone could clearly tell this baby was a welcome addition to the family. What was not so obvious though, was that the couple had been married only about six months, and just a few months before that, got the news she was pregnant. At 19 and 22 they had been planning on abstaining until marriage. As many others can relate to, they were together one time, and she fell pregnant. When he found out, he did not react violently, but immediately went into husband/father mode and they began to plan a wedding. Despite being unplanned this little one was not unloved as some would have you believe all ‘surprises’ are.
Who is she, and what became of her? That little girl was me. I have suffered, quite a bit in my life. But NOT as a result of the timing of my conception. On the contrary, the great love and example of my parents have often given me comfort and the strength to endure. Among other things, from them I have learned how to reach out in compassion, even though someone may be acting in a way that is different from me. And how to grow from my own shortcomings, etc. Because of their examples, it was easier for me to be an advocate for post abortive families, especially the siblings, when I found out about mom’s abortion, during a very different time in her life. I miss my brother very much, but am thankful to be able to bring some beauty from it. I have connected with very many families, post abortive and non, who have been so kind, receptive, helpful to me, etc! Thankfully, the interactions with the bullies have been much fewer.
I wanted to share a little bit of my story with you to be a voice for all the unplanned, born and unborn. Even though I am almost 31, and don’t regret being born, etc I still have moments of pain when I hear that ‘unplanned = unwanted/unloved’ idea. I know others can relate to that, and my heart goes out to them! Please feel free to share this, or other posts from me, if you think it may help someone (whether they are also unplanned, saying we shouldn’t be born, etc).